Number of tears shed: 8 1/2
After a long series of sometimes rushed, sometimes prolonged, sometimes "juuust right" goodbyes and superfluous photo-taking, I think my heart is spent. I have been spending so much time trying to prepare myself to say goodbye to some of my most beloved friends that I had forgotten to just enjoy their company. It's kind of like when you say "see you later" with a conclusive smile to a friend you encounter in a hallway and they wind up going in the same direction that you are walking. You feel their awkward presence behind you, trailing just slow enough so as not to walk at the same pace as you, but not fast enough to pass you so that you don't have to strike up another conversation of obliged pleasantry. I know I'll see these people again. I know we'll meet in different walks of life. I know we'll be seeing each other's faces. Maybe we'll have an occasional catch up over coffee (or I guess, drinks... if that's what old adult geezers do). Maybe we'll have short back-and-forths via email. Maybe we'll invite each other to our selective weddings. baby showers. funerals. I don't know. I guess the sadness stems from a silent sort of abandonment. I know that these girls will go on to do amazing, earth-shattering things. Even if it means being the best mother to four children. Even if it means helping to end world poverty. Whatever it is that they wind up doing, it will be out of my sphere of immediate knowledge. Our lives will no longer inextricably intertwine through mere geography. I can't walk into the other room and ask how things are going. I can't hear ventings over biscuits and jam for breakfast. And that's sad, but it's also exciting. I know that life's made up of a series of hellos and goodbyes. Of wonderful people and horrible people that come and go into and out of your life. I've known since I made and lost my first best friend. Since I hugged my first teddy bear to pieces. Since I gave him away. Since I first loved, and since I first broke. The strange, and almost uncanny part about it is -- someone new always comes along. I don't mean as a replacement. I mean, there's always new people, new loves, new hurts to experience. It's a good thing that people come and go. Either it makes you cherish the people who left, or it makes you appreciate the people that are left behind. Whoever the Lord decides to place into your life and for however long, be thankful for them. You never know how long they'll stay. But you always know for damn sure that they are where they're meant to be, and so are you.
Congratulations, class of 2010.
Photo by Michael LongSherry looks like she's primping her hair.
Above three also by Michael Long, notorious camera snatcher.
Going to miss this girl.(P.s. Shaina, all the photos of you & me are not good. Which moreso means that I look bad in them, do you have any good ones?)
